I hesitated even writing this today, because I know the answer and the truth, but I believe in being transparent and sharing with you all aspects of my journey.
Especially amidst my current stall, I keep going back and forth between the warrior and fighter spirit, and feeling like I am failing or doing something wrong. Sometimes these feelings come and go minute to minute. Believe me, you don’t want to be inside my head, you would be exhausted!!
As I stated before, I know I should not feel bad. I have accomplished more in the last six months than I ever thought possible. My health has improved tremendously. I have a more active and vital life. That being said, I still can’t fight the negativity, especially since it seems that I am doing all the right things. It probably doesn’t help that I have my next check in with the weight center next week, and I don’t want to disappoint my doctor with a big slowdown of loss.
I don’t write this in order to get a pity party or anything like that. But I would like you to be aware that I am going through this. I guess in a way these are feelings that normal people experience with their own bodies, so you could say this is one more step to normalcy.
Thanks as always for reading and sending your support! You are all invaluable to me!